In the mind of a Writer

Archive for January, 2014

Part of the favorite chapter in Melzela

I was told by several of my beta readers that the character Thomas was their favorite.

This is from Melzela
Rebekah Wolveire © 2008-2013

It was on that evening that I found the river that ran through the forest. I cleansed my face allowing the cool liquid cover and flowed over my lips. I swallowed just a small bit realizing it was just like my dream. I was tired and yet relieved. I looked at my reflection in the crystal blue water: my skin was the palest white,  and my eyes were transcendental, glowing almost bright blue with a gold ring on the edge of the pupil.

I took a few small animals for a meal: a squirrel and a muskrat. It was merely survival. Then I cleaned myself in the river. I followed it noticing that got wider and deeper. It was defiantly deep enough to bath in. I stripped down my clothes and bathed. I swam in the cool, calm water.

I got dressed realizing it was getting darker, and I could smell smoke. I followed the river to a small stone path. I followed the small stone path to see the foundation that was also made of stone. I looked around the place as I could smell something sweet. It seemed warm and inviting. I was curious: why would someone just leave a fire burning. I looked again: it was surrounded by many medium sized rock, and it was a low fire.

I walked up to the door. A gentle but rugged man came out

“It’s you. I thought you were only a distant dream,” he made the sign of the cross with his two dominate fingers on his forehead, chest, and then both shoulder. Then he kissed my hand. I was curious at what it meant.

“I’m Thomas, and you are?” He was nervous and yet very excited. His mind swirled with a million thoughts causing a tornado of wonder and awe. They were so fast that that I could not keep up.

“I’m Melzela.” I kept my answer short. After that one moment everything was in motion.


Later that evening, Thomas asked me some things:

“Do you really need to intake blood to survive?” He was nervous in his questions. He did not want to upset me.

“Yes, I do. It was blood ritual I did that went wrong.” I explained honestly. Finally, I was happy enough to tell someone my secret. He already knew from the dreams.

“What happened, if you don’t mind me asking?” He asked so interested.

“We believed the blood was tainted. I was supposed to live forever to find my true love. However I never knew that taking lives and blood would be apart of that.” I was bit flustered over the entire idea.

“Who is we?” He asked wanting to know as many answers as possible.

“There is Pyro, he is the leader, and he loves Aqua. There was Aero and Geo as well.” I explained.

“So they are named after the elements?” He asked; I nodded yes to confirm. We talked most of the night about the rituals and my adventures. He was really interested in the rituals about luck and gratefulness. He also understood how we saw power and energy in the elements and used them in all of our rituals.

“You are more than welcome to stay with me. I usually sleep most of the night, but I can make you a bed before I sleep.” He explained as well as that he went to the bathroom down across the river and down the hill. It keeps from the smell from lingering near the house.

He made a bed for me as his house smelled so sweet. He preserved many berries, tea leaves, and mint. We laid together in the room, just talking, before falling a sleep.

“I must be covered during the day; the sun burns my very fair and pale skin.” I explained.

“Why is that?” He was always asking me questions to learn.

“Pyro believe we anger the sun god; therefore, I am not allowed to be out during the day.” I explained. We talked for a while. One of the last thing Thomas said before he fell asleep:

“I knew ever since the first time I had the dream, I was meant to met you and teach the ways of preservation. I also know you will be the one who will kill me.” He almost sounded satisfied with that as if he was giving me his approval. I was just trying to take this all in.

“I am just fifty-four based on the many moon cycles. In one year, twelve moon cycles, you will take my life on my fifty-five birthday.” He mumbled just before I heard him snore. I laid there completely dumbfounded. I just had met this man, told him my secret,  he admitted that he will teach me, and now he was already telling when I was going to kill him.


He was as straightforward as they come from everything in teachings to his stories. He taught me how to grow herbs, what berries to look for, and how to grow grape. These were all good for preserving wine. He explained that if I mixed human blood with the fomented wine and used herbs like dill or mint (savory or sweet), I could keep the blood longer.

“However, always mark your barrel of wine, because you don’t want your guests drinking your blood wine.” He explained. Blood wine could easily make humans sick, simply because most human being can not digest fat and protein cells in the blood.

He had showed me how to use rope and making my own pulleys to allow a animal or human to hang. I drained the blood in a large tub that he curved out of wood and eventually made one out of stone. We kept this rigging down hill as well, so that no one could smell the dead blood at the house.

Once we had everything working, he went into town and brought a guest. It was a man, a young man. He knew that the man didn’t have anyone, and so he invited him for a hot meal of stew. He made the man some stew. Then we hit him in the head, drug the body to  the pulley system, hung him up, slashed his throat with my dagger, and drained his blood.

It worked very well, I filled two barrels half way with his blood and the rest with the wine and herbs. One barrel was mixed with mint, and the other barrel was mixed with dill. He marked an M on each of the barrels, and we allowed them set a week or so. I would heat it up over the fire, and I really liked the mint or sweeter wine over the dill or savory. 

We had several tests with deer blood, fox blood, and human blood. It was interesting that deer and fox gave me about the same energy about 25% of what I would get if I was drinking from a live human. I noticed that drinking the wine with human blood in it would only give me only 50% of what I would get from drinking a human alive. I  would rather just have taken 50% and kill one life every few months, then to kill more and more human lives.

The blood wine would give me energy for day to day activities, and if I drunk enough I could read mind, but I never had to read Thomas’ mind: he always spoke his mind.

He also showed me how to call animals. However many of the animals were unsure about me. They didn’t know what to read about me, I wasn’t alive. They feared me. I understood most of the animals knew I was living like Thomas was. The animals would come to him and follow him, but they would stop if he got to close to me.


The time went fast with Thomas: I felt day and night went by in a blink, and the moon cycles were like just seconds. I wanted to learn as much as I could. The stories we told each other and the useful things he taught me to help me kill less, but still get my blood in take.  

We walked one evening as the bright colorful sky was fading into the line chasing the sun. Thomas started his teaching about mint, basil, and dill.

“Mint helps indigestion problems. It can also reduce hunger and relax muscles. It will make your wine fresher and more sweet.” He explained picking the sweet scented leaves.

“It can grow anywhere you have moisture.” He added.

“Dill can preserve you wine, but it can turn into a vinegar if you wait more than six months.” He explained.

“I’m not a fan of dill, but I could see it being good for storing wine on a ship voyage.” I replied.

“Now your turn, could you should me how you in take blood on an animal?” He asked wanting to see the animal in me.

“Find me a small animal,” I stated. He found a rabbit. I said thank you.

“you must be grateful for all opportunities or the gods will make it harder to gain opportunities.” I explained; he was fascinated. Then I grabbed the rabbit bit the back of the neck behind the ears.

I read Thomas’ thoughts as I did this: he was torn between disgust and curiosity. He had wondered if this made him a monster or at least a barbarian for watching just a gruesome thing. He wanted to shout “No!” and prevent me from doing it, but he didn’t. I allowed one crimson tear to fall from my eye. He saw how the crimson tear matched the drops of blood coming from my mouth.

“Do you think the meat is still good?” He asked.

“I think if  you cook it right away,” I stated snapping the neck, I couldn’t finish it with his thoughts. He saw the blood on my fangs and he was taken back a bit.

“Now do you know why I drink alone?” I replied cold and indifferent.

“You need the blood to survive, I need the meat. In that way, I think we are one in the same.” he explained, but why didn’t I feel better?

He cooked the rabbit, and then we both gotten mud baths. He explained that covering the flesh in mud, took way from the bodily smells ,and helped the skin. I wasn’t sure how much it did for me other than take away the bloody smell. He watch me cover myself in mud and this was first time in the entire year that he had impure thoughts of me and him.

He plunged into the deep part of the stream cleaning off the mud. I followed him. He came up as the water was cold, so cold that when I had come up I felt the cold water as pressure on my chest. The whole moment was intense: I could feel his eyes on my white flesh and he wanted me. He wanted to touch my body, but he was afraid. He hasn’t touch another woman in years, and I was rusty myself. I knew if anything was going to happen I would have ignite it. However he did splash me to break some tension. I splashed him back, and I enjoyed  our playing.

I have had men older than Thomas when I was a woman of the street. However I never had caring feeling for them like I had with him except for Joseph. I wanted to give him an experience that he would remember. I was shocked when he first kissed me in the stream. Then we grabbed our clothes and ran naked through the woods. It was freeing: we pinned each other on the path. We made it to the house, and we made intimate love. We did this routine everyday for over two weeks.

We had fun together, learned from each other, and enjoyed each others company, but we knew time was going fast. After the two weeks of being animals with carnal ways. He opened to me about his past.

“I had a pretty well-to-do family, I was the forth son of nine kids: three girls and six boys. My father was well known shepherd. In fact, men would come from all around to buy from his flock or at least to buy wool for clothes. I had a wife who had son. However I wanted to be a clever inventor, and my wife and I were banished by my family for wanting to do such acts against God.” He sighed shaking his head.

“My wife Clara supported my inventing and scientific ways, until one day I was working on a project, and I caught the house on fire. I ran out, but Clara and my son Benjamin did not make it. They were burnt alive, and I was banished out of the city limits.” I read his thoughts he didn’t have regrets for his beliefs in science, but he regretted losing Clara and Benjamin.

“I just retreated here, and I tried to avoid human contact.” The main reason he left society is that he believed, he was more of problem than a solution. He never admitted it, but I believe he didn’t count me as human, but something else all together and that was why we could stand each other. He even believed that by staying in tune with nature, he used other parts of his brain; therefore, he was able to have the same dream that I did.


For his last dinner, he had roasted venison, and the smell of it cooking made me desire blood. I had several glasses of the dill, blood wine. I wasn’t sure what to say to him.

“Please describe the another realm, you call the dream world.” He requested. How could I deny his simple request.

“Well, in this world sky changes based on my mood, it was usually is a mixture of oranges, pinks and purples. I have even seen blue clouds with silver linings. The sun is usually red as red as the river that flows through the world. I was also told that when I cry it rains red drops there coming from black and yellow clouds.” I started to describe as I could feel his exhilaration. He wasn’t sure if there was an afterlife, but he hoped if there was Clara and Benjamin would be there to greet him with open arms.

“Describe your library!” He demanded like a little kid.

“There were shelves upon shelves on each of the walls reaching from the floor to ceiling. There were criss-cross shelves with scrolls in each opening. There were walls of books that seemed endless. Just think of all the stories and knowledge you could learn from those books?” I stated as I could see him sitting the library in the marble room where he would apply his knowledge to make experiments.

We finished dinner with a some love making, and then we bathed together. It pulled on me that the past year we had been each others company and within the next few hours, I was going to take his life. We ran around laughing more time before warming up by a fire.

“You are destined to do this, and I have made my peace. I need you to do this for me.” He replied as I cried crimson tears steaming down both eyes.

“My request is that you first bite me, so I know what it feels like. Then we will walk down to the tree, you will tie me up and drain me.” He was so confident in his words, but his thoughts were crying.

“Melzela, it has been privileged and honored to get to know you. I love you, and I hope you do find that true love.” We both cried together for about an hour.


It was a few hours later, I gave him a glass of wine to help with the pain.

“Thank you. Thank you so much Thomas.” I whimpered, and then I bit down into his neck. His blood was the sweetest blood I had ever tasted. I could hear him moan and whimper as well.

I saw his wife and his son in moment eating venison in his house. Then I saw the house fire, and I saw him trying to run back in only to come out empty handed. Then I saw him  with me and the animals, we laughing.

It took all of my strength, but I pulled away with him still alive. He leaned on me: we walked to the tree where I tied him up and pulled him. He was dangling over the stone tub.

 Tears fell out of my eyes, I was choked up; my throat felt like fire. He dangled still alive, barely alive. His eyes were blood shot, his thoughts were fuzzy, and he could barely mumble the words:

“I love you.” He cried, but I echoed:

“I love you too.” I took all of my strength to slice his throat even though the knife went through his neck like butter. The blood splashed everywhere, and most of it finds it way to the tub. I stood there for hours watching it drained. Then I took his body down, drug to the fire, and burnt it. I watched the fire burn the flesh as I cried.

Before he was completely ash, I said some words of remembrance and thanks:

“To the gods,

I, thank you, for having Thomas

In my life

In my soul

In my heart.

May he be remembered

May he be loved

May he find his Dream World.

And maybe someday

I will see him again.

Good Bye flesh

I love you, Thomas.”

“Good bye Thomas. I loved you, and I will never forget what you taught me,” I mumbled in my weeping.

Once the body was burnt, I collected the blood in the barrels, mixed in with some raspberry-grade wine and the herbs. I had four barrels made for me. I cleaned the tub with old wine that had turned to vinegar.

I cleaned up, and I  ambled back to the cottage just before day break. I downed some wine hoping to sleep deep. I slept alone for the first time within a year.  I hoped to seek the dream world.


Random Lists for Writer’s block

Here are a few of my own lists. . . from my blog
(It can help your own muse to make up your own lists. You can even use characters you are already writing with. You can also make the list as small a 3 (use a 6 die and divided by 2), other dice include 4, 6, 8, 10, 12, 20, and 100 or Percent) You can get dice sets at cheap at $4 to 21 for the pound o Dice on
Random Characters

1. Poor person living in a box (roll odds or man and evens for a woman)
2. Crazy Cat Lady (roll a 20 die to see how many cats she has. . . re-roll if you get 5 or lower: needs to be over 5)
3. Store Clerk who is in love with a married customer
4. Base it off the weirdest person you know
5. Gold Digger
6. A good cop working in a station of corrupt cops
7. A pizza delivery person who is allergic to pepperoni
8. Untalented person who is in an art school
9. A hyper kid (use 12 die for age) stuck in a quiet room
10. Business person wanting a family but has no time
11. The pool person who uses sex to gain secrets about married people in the neighborhood
12. A clueless CEO who is lucky enough to keep their business
13. Cat man (half man/half cat)
14. Rebel teenager who has everyone believing they are smart
15. A struggling cook in a rigged reality TV show
16. A person who is convicted of a crime that they never did
17. Geek at a (Comic/Anime) Convention
18. Sugar Mama/Papa figuring out that they are being used
19. A “rat” trying to get information (Roll of a 4 die to see how successful 1. very bad/failing; 2. Unexpected events; 3. got basic facts, but not enough; 4. Got all information)
20. A person doesn’t know that they are. . . (Roll a Die 6: 1. Mutant; 2. Witch; 3. Vampire; 4. Werewolf; 5. Villain; 6. Super Hero)

Random Reasons for a Conflict

1. Friends betrayal: Lies, gossip, and mistrust
2. Cheating
3. Playing with a Chemistry kit
4. Voodoo gone wrong
5. Web of Lies
6. Dealing with confused thieves
7. Fighting
8. Being Possessed/Haunted
9. Political Debate
10. Religious War
11. Intolerance
12. Corrupt power
13. A disease that is taking over the world
14. Solar Flares
15. Zombies
16. A love triangle
17. Magic vs. Science
18. A hidden trader
19. Urban legends becoming real
20. Seven deadly sins (Roll 8: 1. Lust; 2. Laziness; 3. Pride; 4. Anger; 5. Gluttony; 6. Envy; 7.Greed and then re-roll if you get an 8)

Random Places

1. Beach
2. City
3. Grocery Store
4. House (roll a 8 die for rooms 1. Living room; 2. Master bedroom; 3. Guest room; 4. Bathroom; 5. Kitchen; 6. Den; 7. Basement; 8. Attic)
5. Other Planet
6. Airport
7. Bank
8. Mall (Roll 8 die: 1. Gothic; 2. Preppy clothes store; 3. Candle store; 4. Movie/Music store; 5. Video game store; 6. Appliance store; 7.Bath Store; 8.Pet Store)
9. Restaurant (Roll 10 die: 1.Italian; 2. Frances; 3. Asian; 4. Buffet; 5. Steak House; 6. Seafood; 7. Fast Food; 8. Diner; 9. Pizza Parlor; 10 Spanish etc )
10. Junkyard
11. Park
12. Lake
13. Spa
14. On a Cruise ship
15. Casino
16. Bad motel room
17. Public pool
18. An Amusement Park
19. Pawn Shop
20. Produce Market

Random enemy

1. Gossiping Best friend
2. Million Scientist with no common sense
3. Three Mindless Thugs
4. Mob Boss
5. Bratty Teenager
6. Lying Politician
7. Corrupt cop
8. Confused Lawyer
9. Money hungry doctor
10. “Poor” Judge
11. A man who believes he has lost it all
12. Psycho killer
13. Neurotic Rapist
14. Alien (outer-space/ another country)
15. Contagious Cook
16. Paranoid parent
17. Alcoholic in denial
18. Disbelieving Pastor/Priest
19. Lazy teacher
20. An ignored teen

Random Powers

1. Invisibility
2. Telekinesis
3. Telepathic
4. Flight
5. Charm/simple mind control
6. Super strength
7. Super Speed
8. Sonic Voice
9. Hard Skeleton
10. Communication/Commanding animals
11. Changing Physical forms
12. breathing Under Water
13. Cat Eyes: seeing at night
14. Physical control with voice
15. Empathic: share pleasure or pain with others
16. Flexibility
17. Mass-mind control
18. Powers of the Elements (roll 4 die: 1. Water; 2. Air; 3. Fire; 4. Earth)
19. Omega-power All knowing
20. Mixed powers (roll twice and mix power together)

Random Weakness

1. Illness (Roll 8 die: 1. Contagious; 2. Mental; 3. Disease; 4. Plague; 5. Cancer; 6. Cold; 7. Allergy; 8. Infection.)
2. Curse
3. Clumsiness
4. Blindness (Roll percent die for how much)
5. Deafness (Roll percent die for how much)
6. Missing a limb
7. Inappropriate
8. Shy
9. Clueless
10. Too smart for your own good
11. Flighty
12. Hates outdoors
13. Falls asleep at random times
14. Pena-phobic (fears everything)
15. Egotistical
16. Obsessed
17. Unpopular
18. Insecure
19. Stuck in a fantasy world
20. Driven by many personalities

Random Side(kick) Characters

1. Blind sous chef
2. Old person who tells confusing stories
3. A writer/artist who steals all of their ideas
4. An opinionated loud-mouth catalyst
5. An ill neighborhood
6. Anal retentive Cleaner
7. Obsessive coupon lady
8. Inflexible dancer
9. The crazy uncle
10. The man who does nothing
11. Anime writers who eats cold ramen to get inspired
12. a helper monkey
13. a drunken sibling
14. a video gamer who will not leave the house until all of the achievements are accomplished
15. A people pleaser with cranky roommates
16. An artist who has different personalities
17. Opposite roommates/Twins
18. Chaotic Offender/Organized Planner
19. A couch potato that cannot stand what is on TV
20. A curious kid that follows trouble

Writer’s Block Exercise

I’ve had writer’s block lately . . . I’ve had a lot going on: family issues and trying to find a new house etc. I have just been completely creatively blocked. I have worked on a few things to help me break this block.
I play RPG (Role-play games) with a seven set of dice. (4, 6, 8, 10, 12, 20, and percent You can get set of die at your local hobby store or on online stores like You can play pay from a few dollars to twenty dollars for a set or a pound of dices.)
I made random lists of twenty. Examples: Characters, Heroes, Villains, Locations, Super Powers, Conflicts, Strengths, Weakness. Etc.
I roll the dice, then I write. . . the dice makes all of the decisions for me. (You can make it as simple or as complicated at you want.)
List of Lists (Different amounts could use different types of dice.)

1. People (Actors, Artists, Occupations, family etc)
2. Characters (TV, Books, movies)
3. Locations
4. Furniture
5. Transportation
6. Stores
7. Appliances
8. Electronics
9. Rooms
10. Facial Feasures
11. Colors
12. Hair Styles
13. Random things/items
14. Heroes/Allies
15. Enemies/Villains
16. Conflicts/problems
17. Beginning scenarios
18. Middle Twists
19. Endings
20. weapons
21. ways to kill your characters
22. Alternatives lives
23. reasons for a party
24. reasons for sex
25. reasons for a meeting
26. daily schedule
27. Jobs
28. chances (good/bad)
29. What if scenarios
30. Foods

Some of my Lists . . . . (Creating your own lists can help the creative juices to flow. However if you cannot come up with ideas of your own. Here are a few lists of mine that you can use for exercises to motivate your muses.)

Happy Writing in 2014

Happy New Year! I’ve had some Internet problems or I would have had this posted a few weeks ago.
I hope my fellow writers are fiercely writing or researching for Camp NaNo (in April).
This year I do not want to make my writing an afterthought like I felt happen in 2013. I want to be able to write as much as I can, even if I have to take a notebook everywhere I go. (It’s only been 15 days into the month and so far I have written 17,120 words)

My New Year Goals

1. Write something everyday
2. Finished several projects (list below)
3. Work several new projects (list below)
4. Post at least two blogs a month (writing and personal blogs)
5. Read more (post suggestions: I prefer Paranormal/occult: No Twilight)
6. Work on Prompts
7. Therapy writing (writing straight out of my head)
8. Make monthly goals
9. Edit several Projects
10. Work on Characters for my vampire novel series: Crimson Shadow Collection

Projects to Finish

1. Darken Cake (Short Story)
2. He Said, She Said (Short Story)
3. Driving Lies (end)
4. Book 13
5. Blood Bound (Short Story)
6. College Story (Novel)
7. Dragon Story (Novel)

New Projects

1. Recipe Book
2. Urban Legend (book of Short stories)
3. More short stories
4. The Dice project
5. The Whispering Path Book 2
6. Crimson Shadow Collection Book 2: Daris (Title in progress)
7. Book of Confessions/ Karma (Short Stories)

Projects to Edit

1. Crimson Shadow Collection Book 1: Melzela
2. The Whispering Path Book 1
3. Driving Lies Part 1
4. Driving Lies Part 2
5. Driving Lies 3
6. Short Stories
7. All projects that I finish

January Goals

1. Writing every day
2. Make lists/goals
3. Work on Dice project (I will have a blog post on the Dice project)
4. Review my previous work
a. Melzela
b. The Whispering Path
c. Driving Lies
5. Get Inspired/ Find new ways to be inspired